struggle

October 22, 2005

i feel so disoriented today. i don't know what's wrong with me. i've hardly been myself all day, despite my superhuman attempts to try and tell myself everything is fine.

where does the thin line between reality and wishful thinking blur?

does psyching oneself really work? when you try and tell yourself something over and over again, does your mind really believe it? and when it does work, wouldn't it be pretentious, seeing as your heart feels it really isn't true?

a battle is waged, between reason and feeling. between logic and emotion.

who has the upper hand? who will win?

two opposite sides of the same coin, but only one can come out on top.

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5 comments

  1. i'd wager that you love the struggle, la.

    that's what keeping you from finally choosing.

    ReplyDelete
  2. ohme: no thanks. haha. i don't use religion to solve my probs. =]

    van: you may have a point there. or not.

    ReplyDelete
  3. hey! i just happened to stumble upon your blog and let me tell you this. i sOo can relate to everything you rant about. well, except for the harry potter part, that is, hehe (not a fan)...but everything else hits the mark. especially this short but gut-wrenching entry of yours, if i may say so. couldn't have said it better. exactly everything i feel in a nutshell.

    your avid blog-reader here :)

    ReplyDelete
  4. anonymous: thanks for the kind words. it's nice to know people appreciate what i write. i wish i could write more stuff like this, and not the kind of crap i keep putting out lately.

    ReplyDelete

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