Thirty Years Old, and Nothing to Show For It

Thursday, September 30, 2010

10 years ago, I was a college student at UP Diliman. I was just beginning to drink in the full college experience: late nights, alcohol, and the general feeling of being happy-go-lucky with everything that came my way. I din't care much for grades, despite being a consistent honor student during elementary and a relatively good student during high school; I was contentNAY, happy, not caring even when I got 3.0's. I figured that the best lessons you can learn, you learn outside the classroom. I still believe it until now.

But I digress.


Despite my aforementioned indifference, I still had dreams. I'm not the type of person who plans everything, but I had dreams. Back then, I knew already that I wanted to be involved with art. I wanted to create advertising campaigns that would move people. I wanted to do designs that were unique and unconventional. I wanted to make music that would speak to everyone. I wanted it all, so to speak. I couldn't wait to finish college. I was raring to go out into the world, to take steps towards fulfilling my dreams.

10 years have passed since. What have I got to show for it?

After a couple of mediocre jobs, a 4-year stint in a small advertising agency that ended on a sad note and a one-month freelance gig at McCann, I now find myself jobless, almost penniless and defeated for the first time in many years. Unlike previous times I've hit life's potholes though, I have absolutely no idea where to go from here.

Fuck.

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8 comments

  1. When in need of a direction, straight ahead is almost always the best choice my friend.

    If I were to break it down: It looks like you lost a couple of jobs, had a gig at an excellent ad agency, and now you've just gotta tighten your belt a little while you figure out your next move.

    The 20 year old you sounded like a guy who wouldn't let that stuff bother him. I suggest you get in touch with that guy. If you really do still believe that the "best lessons you can learn, you learn outside the classroom", then take those 10 years of valuable lessons and apply them in moving forward. I have no doubt you'll figure something out.

    I've seen your stuff man, the potential for greatness is definitely there. The best part of life, however, is in the becoming, and not the being.

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  2. I just read your comment man and I am seriously lost for words right now. All I can say is thank you for taking the time to comment and FUCKING HITTING THE NAIL RIGHT IN THE HEAD. I guess I was just too caught up in all the shit that's been happening to me recently that I kinda lost my way. What you said was like a punch in the gut, and now I'm slowly feeling the fight in me creeping back. Yes.

    Thanks again man. Really.

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  3. Nasan na kasi yung t-shirt business natin

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  4. What I wanna say has been said. :3 Take this opportunity positively. Don't be too hard on yourself, man. Be positive and all the positive vibes will come.

    Pfft. I should also be telling myself that. X3

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  5. You can do it!

    (This is encouragement, not the name of that crappy band)

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  6. I guess your childhood memories are f*cked up as you are now.

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  7. That din't even make sense. Also, my inner child says "Fuck you."

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